doesnt really matter because its not like anyone talks to me or comments on here,
soppose this is just for myself to look back on and compare my quailty of life to the present.
Anyways, alot has gone on, most of wich ive forgotten...
back at college doing the animal management course, few months ago stephen (my brother) found a 3month old kitten and it followed him back to our house so we took it in and it become really ill, due to a underlying problem that we couldnt have known of. long story short- she was taken to the vet and put on fluids, we were told she would make a full recovery but half hour later she died of heart failiure due to her kidneys failing. :'( was the worst feeling ever haveing to put her in the cold soil, wrapped in her bed blanket. she was so young, made me feel like the most fattest piece of shit ever, she could have had my life... i dont need it.
ive ruined my life... fucked it all up, broken into millions of shitty pieces that just cant be fixed...
the only part of this life that has any meaning is shane... he keeps me together, he makes sure im okay and if it wernt for him i really would be dead already. so hes like my life machine, as soon as hes gone... means im gone too <3 :(
